It’s that time of the month. Again.
You heard me.
We’re almost in the 11th month of the year. The days have flown by so fast-it puts a cheetah to shame! It feels like yesterday when my now very active toddler took her first steps or her feisty sister started school. Wasn’t it just summertime when we went cycling in the sun?
We’ve come around almost full circle again.
It began somewhere between celebrating the death of loved ones (and I say ‘celebrate’ deliberately) and the welcoming of a new family member; albeit by law. It snuck up on us like a foul prank gone wrong, like a stranger on the road lurking suspiciously in the shadows. It enveloped us overshadowing the possibility of ever rising above.
We were sinking.
The business was sinking.
Anyone can fake happiness. I can. Sometimes. I’m an optimist so I tell myself to toughen up and brace for the storm. But this time was different. The bills kept piling high. The lists only got longer. The frustration only grew stronger. Everyday was spent waiting in silent anticipation for that one phone call. They say there’s light at the end of the tunnel but our tunnel didn’t seem to have an end.
Weeks turned to months and we kept trudging by always dreading when the end of the month was nearing. We’d look furtively at one other over the chaos of child rearing each wondering the same thing- where was God in all this?
One morning, about a few months back as I reluctantly woke up from a fretful nights sleep, I looked at my husband and said- ‘I’m going on an adventure—with God. I want to see how far He takes me, blindfolded, into the unknown!’
He said –
God didn’t disappoint. When we let go of depending on our human ability to solve our problem, He stepped in. And what an adventure it has been! Things were so bad at times, my husband and I would laugh out loud at the ridiculousness of it but all the while waiting in eagerness to watch how He would bring us through. Always.
He. Never. Disappoints.
We always paid our bills on time.
We never went without a meal-might I add – a GOOD meal !
We had friends and family supporting us.
We had enough to give.
His eye is on the sparrow, I know He watches me.